"You don't have to call, it's okay, girl, cuz I'm a be alright tonight" - Usher (featuring Ludacris), You Don't Have to Call Remix [buy the album]
"I'm representin' for them gangstas all across the world, still...hittin' them corners in them low-lows, girl"
Besides being able to hit switches on Sunset Boulevard, all we really needed was for a mushroom cloud of chronic smoke to billow out of car as we hit The Standard Hotel valet area. Felicia is rolling in a white Grand Marquis for the next 4 weeks as her baby gets some body work done. When I sank into her front seat, she turned the key in the ignition and BUH buh buh buh buhbuh... Dre and Nate Dogg let me know it was time for the next episode.
It's Friday night and it's near the end of LA's Fashion Week. We're here for the Yana K Fall 2005 lineup. Well, that's not entirely true. We're here for The MVP. When she IMs me, I do whatever she says. That's why she's the M to the P with the V in the middle. She's a playmaker.
mvp: I want to invite you to a fa-
me: I'm there.
Felicia is looking lovely while I'm lookin' hipster 4 life. The triple 5 soul blazer, the dodge dart baseball tee, the two tone leather superstars, sidekick in the inside pocket. I'm learning how to navigate this scene without losing my soul. I'm not the flyest one in the building but I'm the flyest me I can be...and people notice. The right people and that's all that matters.
We rush across the mini-red carpet which is hilarious in it's own right. LA must keep the entire mini-red carpet business afloat by itself. Flashes go off as we cross but we don't turn to acknowledge. It's early and the photogs aren't sure if we matter or not so they snap a few just in case.
We're poolside. We find a place to sit and get drinks and people watch for the next 30 minutes. Everyone is hot. I want to lick people. I want to put my hand on the small of their backs and sneak a finger into a belt buckle or just inside their low rise jeans right at their hip. I want to nibble on chins.
Hov and Red aren't here yet and The MVP is nowhere to be found. I take a lap. There's Shane West and Tara Reid and Courtney Peldon and aHahahahaha. I sidekick the fuggingitup ladies immediately and curse them for not being on instant messenger as I laugh my face off. Hov and Red arrive and Red, looking super fly herself, takes a seat next to us.
"Did you see The MVP," I ask immediately.
"No, but we'll see her soon enough. She's in the show."
Nate Dogg says, "Hold up. Hey-Ay." She's in the show. Well, damn son. Now it's getting good. DJ Morty of Spider Club's 80s Mondays spins some serious tracks and the show begins. Yana K has some hot shit. She's putting hoodies and jackets back on the map for dudes and ladies can rock some polka dots next year. It takes me two times to notice but the glistening lips of Meagan Good are walking the runway as well and she's killing it. Hov said she watched me the whole night and it was the first time she'd seen me totally "guy out."
"I could tell which girls you liked," she said.
"What gave it away? The clapping, the shaking my head no when it was all just too much, or when I jumped the stage and tackled Meagan and the MVP?"
Oh. The MVP. She walks the stage like she dances with me. Attitude. A smile. A rock of the hip. A knowing "I'm cute and smart and perfect and hot and you love me and can't help it" glance here and there. I nearly stood up in my seat. I tried to get pictures but I fumbled on the 1 yard line. All you will get is blur.
I would've been set for the rest of the night but the night was just beginning...